Santa's Little Helper
you dont know what it's like working for santa claus
have you ever closely examined the poor little reindeer paws
have you ever gone to the northpole and seen the factory life
have you ever interviewed mrs. claus (aka wife)
you dont know what it's like working for santa claus
you don't know what it's like filling up candy jars
the tedium of index and thumb on gum
leaves some with mental scars
and no job is ever as sweet as it sounds
the belt in his hand proves he's mean all around
and you dont know what it's like working for santa claus
santa has one clause and this is it:
once one is hired one may never quit.
santa takes the joy out of christmas
to be fired, to be fired's at the top of my wish . . . list . . .
no matter what the season whether snow falls freezin or thaws
the sound of no laughing, drill bits, hammers and saws
while visions of sugarplums dance in your head
im lucky if in three days mine touches a bed
and you dont know what it's like working for santa claus
the rose in his cheeks; a rouge for his flaws
a muzzle for dominick the donkey (hee-haw!)
oh christmas is cool, i work for a good cause
it's just i cant stand santa claus