How To Sleigh A Reindeer 

 

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you dont kno what it's like working for santa claus

have u ever closely examined the poor little reindeer paws

have u ever gone to the northpole and seen the factory life

have you ever interviewed mrs claus (aka wife)

you dont kno what it's like working for santa claus

 

you don't kno what it's like fillin up candy jars

the tedium of index and thumb on gum leaves some with mental scars

and no job is ever as sweet as it sounds

the belt in his hand proves he's mean all around 

and you dont kno what it's like working for santa claus

 

santa has one clause and this is it

once one is hired one may never quit

santa takes the joy out of christmas

to be fired, to be fired's at the top of my wish list . . .

 

no matter what the season whether snow falls freezin or thaws

the sound of no laughing, drill bits, hammers and saws

while visions of sugarplums dance in yr head

im lucky if in three days mine touches a bed

and you dont kno what it's like working for santa claus  

 

the rose in his cheeks; a rouge for his flaws

a muzzle for dominick the donkey (hee-haw)

oh christmas is cool, i know i work for a good cause

it's just i cant stand santa claus

 

 

 

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